My So-Called Ugly Shower

Dear Bathroom, When I moved into my apartment, the showerbath looked like this: That was ugly, so I put up a white shower curtain. This made the room look much more clean and fresh (I promise. It looked good in real life. This is a terrible photo): But the white curtain was boring, so I replaced it with a shower curtain I stole from my mother’s linen closet. The good thing about my mother is that she hoards sheets, towels, and all sorts of linens. Continuously buying linens gives her a sense that everything is under control and the world…

Whoopie!

By Contributing Food Editor Jared Levan Dear Pennsylvania, On behalf of everyone (save the residents of Maine and Massachusetts…look it up) I’d like to thank you for contributing the most delightful sweet treat of my childhood years–the whoopie pie. Rumor has it that Amish women living in Lancaster, PA would make whoopie pies and sneak them into their husband’s lunch pails prepared for a day of work in the fields. When the unsuspecting men, famished from a morning of hard labor, opened their lunches they’d be thrilled at the sight of these sweet, fluffy little goodies to which they would…

Out With The Old…

Dear Apartment, You know, every once in a while it’s a good idea to freshen things up. Lately I’ve been noticing that every single thing that surrounds me is vintage. Which is great. I love vintage pieces because they are so much more interesting than new, mass manufactured furniture. But I think it’s good to have a balance of old and new so my place doesn’t look like it belongs to a grandpa (not that I have anything against grandpas, I love mine). Thus, I decided to add something new to my living room. Here’s what it looked like before…

Going to LACMA: Such A Burden!

Dear Jennifer Love Hewitt, I’ve been promising to tell you about what my favorite place in Los Angeles is and, well, here it is. I love LACMA (the Los Angeles County Museum of Art). There, I said it and I’m not ashamed. It’s my favorite place in this city. It gives me a sense of peace in a world full of chaos. I visited recently to check out the new Chris Burden installation (‘Metropolis II’) I was hearing so much about. It’s pretty amazing. But don’t take my word for it. Watch this mini documentary about it: We went on…

Five Things I Loved And Bought

Dear Anjelica Huston, I know you’ve been concerned about my wardrobe lately, so I did a little shopping and here are some of the things I purchased. I was in desperate need of some new shoes so my search started there. I found these delightful Vans on sale for $40 (they’re supposed to be $90). As you my know, I was raised in Yosemite Valley and I’ve never seen a Yosemite shirt this cool. I got this on sale for $15. Apparently I really like Vans, because I bought these too. They were also on sale for $40 (from $80)….

Hungry? Why Not Have a Sandwich?

By Contributing Food Editor Jared Levan Dear Incredible-Edible Sandwich, I love the way you look sitting there on the plate, begging to be eaten. And though I’m not quite sure how, you possess some strange power over me to which I am utterly helpless. Never in all my years would I have imagined you’d look so delicious sliced in-two and slapped on top of a photocopier. Jon Chonko, of Scanwiches decided to capture the beauty of the almighty sandwich using nothing but a xerox–no photoshop here. Their philosophy is simple, it’s all about the true beauty of the bread and…

Awkward Space? Put A Bench On It!

Dear Benches, You have no idea how handy you are in home decorating? Awkward empty wall? Add a bench! Weird space at the end of the bed? Put a bench on it! Empty space in the bathroom that keeps reminding you how empty your life is? Bench! I think you get the picture. Thus, Emily and I are always looking for benches. Often, we enter stores and flea markets screaming at each other in terror about how there just aren’t enough benches. For some reason flea markets have been dry as a bone when it comes to benches, so I’ve…

Beautiful Photography / Melancholia & Gregory Crewdson

Dear Kirsten Dunst, I loved your work in the film ‘Melancholia,’ which I just got around to seeing last week. While your acting was quite amazing, the thing that struck me most about the film was its opening sequence. The first eight minutes of the film are so beautiful and enthralling they could stand alone as a short film. The imagery in these opening scenes will probably seem familiar to anyone who has seen the work of Gregory Crewdson, a photographer who specializes in dramatically lit, color-rich, surreal images. I didn’t really make the connection until a friend of mine…

Why Do I Deny Myself The Thing I Love Most?

Dear Diary, If you did a scan of my brain, it would look something like this: Everything in my head is neon and bright and beachy (this is one reason why I love Los Angeles so much). I tend to shy away from using these colors in my apartment because my deepest fear (aside from dying alone, surrounding by cats) is making my apartment look like a gay cartoon rainbow explosion. But I can’t stop fantasizing about having this kind of color in my apartment: Meanwhile, I just painted my walls this color (Benjamin Moore Half Moon Crest). Snore. Oh,…