Birthday Cake…Not for you, Rihanna

By Contributing Food Editor Jared Levan To All the Cake Lovers, Yes–that was a Kylie reference. It’s been quite a long time since my last post, but in honor of an upcoming Hommemaker birthday (July 5th), I decided Orlando needed a post dedicated entire to cake. There are probably some of you who would prefer something on pie, pastry or pudding…but we’ll get to you and yours another time. For the big 3-0, Orlando has decided on a “rustic/woodland” themed extravaganza. Now you may be asking yourself, what does a rustic/woodland cake look like? That’s a good question. I had…

Cover Thine Naked Walls In Stickers.

Dear Empty Walls, Are you ever sitting there all like “Oh my god I’m naked I wish someone would put a sticker on me”? And then you look around and all the wall decals out there are, like, totally gross? Well, I have found a solution to your nakedness. There a few wall stickers out there that will cover you in beauty and glamour. For the most part wall stickers are cheesy and gross and look like they belong in college dorms. But don’t lose hope! A few sophisticated options do exist… Keith Haring Wall Sticker from Blik. $50. I…

All I Want For My Birthday Is Everything.

Dear Friends, Family, and Internet Strangers, In about a week, I am going to turn 30 years old. I’ve been freaking out about a little bit. Not because I am scared of getting older. I’ve always liked older people more than younger people (Young people are idiots, am I right? I’ve always hated them). The main reason for my freak out is that when I was little I thought being 30 meant being a total grown up and I still feel like I have the maturity level of Raven Simone’s beloved namesake on That’s So Raven (unfortunately for me, however,…

Californiatimez: Hiking, Cactii, and the Most Amazing Plant Nursery on Earth

Dear Diary, Last weekend, some gays and I decided to escape the madness that is LA Pride and head to the little town of Fillmore, California to take a hike and discover new things. Naturally, because we are 90z gays, we took a Jeep wrangler, with the top down. I don’t know if you’ve ever experienced riding in the back of a Jeep Wrangler, but a word to the wise: don’t ride in the back when it’s cold outside. It’s the coldest you’ll ever be in your whole life. I froze to death and it was really sad. But then…

Whut Glamour: Tham & Videgård

Dear Swedish Architecture Firm Tham & Videgård, I discovered you a few weeks back when I was researching tree houses. You made this awesome treehouse: Not only do you design glamourous tree houses, you also design modern, exciting homes for lucky, beautiful rich people. Below are a selection of my favorites. House K This one is pretty minimal, cold, and scary from the outside, but looks modern and delightful from the inside. Nora I’ve always dreamed of living in a little box like this one. Garden House This house is genius because it takes something kinda depressing (lattice), blows up the…

Palm Springs Overdose

Dear Reader, When I was a little boy, obese with braces on my teeth, I used to love whipped cream. We never used the canned kind, my mother always whipped it up the real stuff. I loved it until one day when I went overboard. That day I ate a whole entire bowl of whipped cream by myself. I’ve never been so sick in my life. I’m telling you this story not only to let you know that I was a fat kid, but also to provide a warning to you: too much of a good thing is a bad…

Orlando’s Obsession: Tiled Fireplaces

Dear Santa, I know you love to come down the chimney on Christmas. But let’s be honest, when you emerge through the fireplace, sometimes it’s a bit of a let down. I mean, how many orangey-red bricks can you look at before you want to gouge out your eyeballs with a candy cane? I have a solution for you, Santa. It’s called tiling your fireplace and you’re going to love it. I’ve been thinking about tiled fireplaces lately because Emily and I have a client who wants to add a feminine touch to her fireplace. Tile is a good way…

D.I.Why? Secret Painting Bulletin Board

Dear You, See this painting? I hope so, it’s right in front of your face. But guess what? It’s not a painting. It’s a bulletin board. Would you like to know how I made it? Me neither. But I’ll tell you anyway. First, I went to the art supply store where scary artist sales associate helped me find canvas. It costs about $7 a yard. I got mine from Dick Blick. I used acrylic paint I had leftover from a previous project. It’s a very pretty color of navy blue. I watered the paint down to give it a tie-dye…