Category Archives: Emily

Dear Emily,

Remember last weekend when we went to the Long Beach Antique Market and it was, like, the worst experience of our whole lives? Well, it was raining, which was a bad sign, but we went anyway. As we were arriving (later than normal due to both of us oversleeping), all the vendors were rushing to put their stuff away, running away from us in terror like we were zombies coming for their flesh. For those of you who don’t live in Southern California, it should be noted that people here respond to rain as if it were the worst natural disaster in the world. I don’t personally own an umbrella or any other gear that would protect me from rain. So when it rains it kind of ruins the world. And flea markets. Thus, Emily and I pretty much started crying and whining as soon as we got to Long Beach. I was unconsolable. Until Emily slapped me and told me we better get shopping before all the stuff was packed up and taken away. We frantically ran from vendor to vendor in search of deals. Despite the life ruining weather, we found some scores.

I kind of like these stupid mannequins. I would.

We liked this bench for one of our clients but it’s SO LONG!

I liked this outdoor fire pit thing. If I were a lady I would put this in my ladygarden. That wasn’t meant to sound dirty but it kind of did. Sorrlz.

We bought the blue bench for a client. $100.

Look at this leather bag! We bought it for a client for $40!

We almost bought this for a French Industrial client, but it was $400 and there wasn’t a good place for it in her house.

Whenever Emily sees brass, her eyes turn into spirals and she walks straight to it like a zombie. These bookends were $20. We didn’t buy them because we were depressed about the rain.

Emily: “Should we get this?” Me: “Sure.” Emily: “I’m bored.”

GOLD CHEST! GOLD CHEST! $100.

We bought this trunk for the end of a client’s enormous bed. $100.

We almost bought this for a client’s playtable. But it’s kinda boring and would probably benefit from being spray lacquered white, which would make it too expensive for their budget. $120.

Because it was raining, we ran away from the flea market almost as fast as all the vendors. We fled to the antique mall in Pasadena, where luckily they were serving hot apple cider and cookies. Which made us feel better because sometimes we like to eat our feelings. We saw a few cool things there, too.

Look at this cool architectural model! It would be a supes fun coffee table.

Emily: “I don’t like black leather, but I love this chair!” Me: “I’m bored.”

I like this painting at the Pasadena antique mall. It’s $125 though so I might just make a knock off myself. I am a terrible person.

We liked this bench for our modern-pop clients but then Emily sat on it and it almost broke. Emily weighs 17 lbs. Dealbreaker.

We like this table for our French industrial client but it was too big.

Look at this ridiculous hat/box situation! I mean, the beautiful handmade hat comes in a beautiful handmade box. SO much work! But so neato!

Me: “Look at that awesome armoire!” Emily: <cricket noises>

This trunk is stupid. I don’t know why I took a picture of it. I’m an idiot.

We like this Paris map but it’s $250. Conundrums.

This little drum is cute. And so are you. $150

This makes me want to kidnap Angela Lansbury and lock her in a room, forcing her to write about mysterious events like she did on ‘Murder She Wrote.’

We like this chair but it’s arms fell off. Oops! $250.

I know what I’m getting Emily for Christmas…

This Moroccan chest was $400. Not too bad…

We’ve looked at this painting many times, but never buy it because it’s tiny and $175.

Look, a trumpet horn thingy! Or whatever. $100. (We didn’t buy it).

These vintage 3D maps were a bit steep at $250, but we both loved them deeply.

Finally, because we could not stop shopping, we wandered around Old Town Pasadena. This is a rug we’re looking at for a client. It a pretty great value. It’s $299 for an 8′ x 10′! From Crate & Barrel.

At the end of the day we actually got a lot done. We were devastated by how lame the rained out flea market was, but a glamorous secret lunch in Pasadena followed by some good antique mall time made up for it. Thank goodness.

Love,
Orlando

Dear Diary,

Emily and I headed out to Long Beach on Sunday to revel in all the flea covered glory of the Long Beach Antique and Collectible Market (AKA the flea). Usually Long Beach is good but this week was especially amazing. Unlike Rose Bowl, where prices are generally higher, Long Beach was full of deals. For the second week in a row it was raining, but to be honest I love that kind of weather because it keeps it from getting to hot while we’re running around buying EVERYTHING (which we did). Here’s what we found:

This fun horse sculpture. Which will make a great conversation piece (and scare the children) when we find it a home. $75.

Emily pretty much screamed “MINE!” when she saw these tins. $10.

We were into this leather chair and ottoman. Until we realized it was totally ugly except for the aged leather. $400.

I bought this great 1960s architectural drawing to go in my dining area. It’s a painting of an old strip mall. A FunFact about me is that I love old strip malls (like the ones in ‘Edward Scissorhands’). $75.

“Hey Emily: See that drawing? That’s your boyfriend.” $10.

We’ve seen these wire sculptures at fancypants stores for $80, but we got ours for $20. They look great sitting next to a stack of books or on a bar. One thing I’ve learned working on the show is how hard it is to find accessories that read as masculine, so whenever we find them we snatch them up.

If I had to use one image to define my outlook on the world, it might be this one. It’s pretty much the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen in my life (note the neon tube light on the lower portion). $1200.

We keep running into super cute dogs everywhere we go. And then we get all mad that we don’t have dogs. And then we realize that if we had dogs we’d be neglectful dogparents because we work too much to take care of anything. And then we hate ourselves for existing. And then we hug because we feel alone.

This headboard looks a little gross in this color, but we are going to customize it for a special client, changing the shape and using a superluxe fabric to make it the best headboard ever. Exciting. $60.

We didn’t buy any of this, but I couldn’t help but notice the totally OCD way the seller displayed everything. I love old Pyrex, especially when it’s displayed by someone as obsessive as I am.

This will make a nice vessel to stick some branches in. I’d put it on an outdoor dining table for a garden party (sidenote: I regret that I’m not at a garden party RIGHT NOW. Hurry, Summer, HURRY!). $40.

This dodo bird carving was stupid cheap. $30. We were all scared to ask because it looked like it would be $300.

Whenever Emily spots a horse sculpture, her eyes glaze over and she immediately walks over to it and buys it. The lady loves horse art, but who doesn’t? $60.

I am kinda sad we didn’t buy this guy. Such a pretty piece. $250.

Some fat little quails to add to our menagerie of birds. $30.

While Emily is an actual crazy cat lady, I just have a thing for insane cat paintings. Part of me wants to start a collection of them. Another part of me would prefer to not be single forever. Decisions, decisions! $100.

A pretty metal box. When you have to fill up shelves, coffee tables, and side tables every week, you can never have enough boxes. $20.

We totally scored on paintings. So many pretty, cracking landscapes and seascapes. $50.

Emily and our new friend Tiki. Who knew we’d ever be friends with someone like that? Tiki you so crazy! $40.

Rebecca, the art department treasurer, scored these rad chairs for her office. I was seething with envy. She’s going to reupholster them in something fancy. I think they’re cute as a button. $300.

Another pretty painting. It’s so romantic and enthralling in real life. Makes me want to run away to the mountains, make naturepaintings, and scowl at any human that comes near me, enjoying only the company of plants and animals. $125.

Emily never met a brass animal head she didn’t like. $20.

Ratty nature painting. Loveworn. $20.

Oh hi, fancyman in a tophat! Let’s be friends! $30.

Brass magnifying object thing. $20. Why not?

Dear Reader,

This past Sunday was the mother of all flea markets, Rose Bowl. It started out a little rocky because I went out the night before until 2 AM and then woke up at 5:45 to rush over to Pasadena only to find out it was rainy and gross. Sidenote: I love how devastating it is when it rains in LA. First of all, no one ever expects it to happen so we have no idea what to do. “What is this strange wet substance falling from the heavens?” we all asked each other, bewildered that something so inconvenient could ever happen in Southern California. No one had umbrellas and everyone was just walking around in the rain, miserable, pretending that if we acted like it wasn’t raining we could just make it stop. Which we did. The end of the day was glorious and rain-free and the stuff we found totally made up for the fact that we had were wet and sad in the early morning. Anyway, enough with the chit-chat, let’s get to business.

Emily spotted this pretty chair. We’re both drawn to anything blue so this was a definite yes from the get go. $375.

It seems impossible to resist globes, no matter how ubiquitous they’ve become. It’s especially exciting to find a specimen like this, which is classic and yet not your run-of-the-mill boring school globe. $50.

Emily found this little guy, which we’re going to use as a side table (with the rolling cover open). Totally cute and interesting. $65.

This lamp looks a little naked, but once we buy him a pretty shade, he’s gonna look super gorgeous. $45.

Find me a person who doesn’t love Honest Abe and I will challenge that person to a duel. Just the very thought of him and his steadfast dedication to honesty brings warmth to my heart. $20.

This pic is a double-whammy because we bought not only the cool folding table, but also the totally glamourous typewriter (which we are only allowed to handle with white gloves). Typewriter $85. Table $75.

Vintage telephones make such nice sculptures. And they kind make me wish I still had a land line. Can you imagine some turn-of-the-century man with a top hat and handlebar mustache saying “Can you hear me now?” $20.

“E” street sign. Emily insists on hiding E’s in every episode. I’m still trying to figure out why. Guess I’ll never know… $10.

Sexy filing box. We bought 3. $10 each.

This was one of my favorite things we bought. It was a “Class of 1912″ print with all these graduates. But the graduates are all 75 years old so they either took a super long time to graduate from college or they were graduating from something else. Mysterious. Note our pretty friend/SFAS teammate, Rebecca. $25.

And me posing with it just for fun.

This photo timer gave us all nostalgia for the days we spent developing film in the darkroom. And then we felt old. $30.

Hey Little Lamp, what’s your name? Wanna come home with me? OK. $120.

A staircase lamp, gets me every time. If I had a lamp like this growing up I would have forced my hamster to walk up it over and over and over. Thank goodness my parents didn’t have one. $125.

When we asked why this fan was $100 the seller said “Because it’s green.” So we bought it. Because we needed it (seriously). $100.

I know, I know, these look totally gross. But imagine them with more luxe upholstery in a super quirky-chic room. They’re going to look great. I promise. Or your money back! $15 each.

Emily pointed out this piece because it’s functions like a cloche (meaning you can display things in it) but it’s a little different (it’s important to mix things up). $75.

So, there you have it. Another totally fun shopping adventure with Emily. Delightful.

Love,
Orlando